Falling asleep alone is getting easier, but still takes time every night. Today I did something that I used to love: I went to yoga. Surprisingly, after months of not going, I still have my flexibility. I guess after 10 years of cheerleading you don’t lose that too easily! For the rest of the day I am planning to get some homework done, check out DAT books at the library, maybe workout a little bit more, and then hopefully end the evening painting. I am trying my best to keep my life busy so that I don’t allow the negativity and anxiety to pester inside of me. Idle hands are the devil’s playground, and in my case so is an idle mind.
It feels as if though I am refinding myself. Mid-way through falling in love with Hale, I fell out of love with myself. And now I need to find my inner voice again. We don’t need to break up over this, it’s not even anything wrong! Our relationship is actually getting better and I can feel the toxins releasing. Lights look brighter and air smells fresher.