EVERYTHING FUCKING REMINDS ME OF YOU NOW

WHY DID HE MAKE ME DO THIS? Open up. He offered me a shovel to dig up past demons and I wholeheartedly obeyed. I thought that if I told him about prior issues he would comfort me, but I was wrong. I was stupid. It was a moment of utter weakness. My mind is now racing at 100 mph. Anxious thoughts flooding my brain while tears continually stream down my face. Last night was hard. This morning was better, but still aches. He set the bar so high that now I expect him to do the things that he does and when he doesn’t I feel disappointed. On one hand I think that I should give him a break and that he has already given so much, but then on the other hand I feel as if though I love myself too much to expect anything less. Everything reminds me of him. We’ve made too many memories. The only thing that gets him out of my mind is driving, but I only have so much gas. Especially, when I’m paying for it.

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